Running with Angels

Running with Angels: The Inspiring Journey of a Woman Who Turned Personal Tragedy into Triumph Over Obesity by Pamela H. Hansen copyright 2005

As a general rule, I enjoy biographies. That being said, I was skeptical about this book until I heard the author speak at a Time Out for Women event a few years back. She genuinely related the events in her life that led to her being obese and the journey to reclaim her body. I related with much of what she felt and so found the book. The result was not only an enjoyable read, but an inspiring story. One that inspired me to "try again".

Each chapter in the book begins with a flashback scene to the author running her first marathon. It follows with experiences from her struggles with being obese. One of the circumstances of Ms. Hansen's life is the fact that a couple of her children are living with chronic illness that require a lot of physical and emotional stamina and how she constantly sacrifices her well-being in order to serve them. She certainly wouldn't put it that way. She is a wonderful, selfless mother. But she lacked balance in that she wasn't giving herself enough care. Ultimately the loss of a baby moves her to find a way other than food to cope with her grief and daily stress.

She chronicles her attempts over the years to exercise and diet. Her failures feed her feelings of weakness and poor self-esteem. For me one of the most hopeful, and motivating, statements come from later in the book, after she has been quite successful over a period of time with losing weight and exercising regularly.

"Each of those countless times that I started an exercise and/or eating program, it would last for a time and then I'd be right back to where I was before. For thirteen years I had felt as though I could "do it myself," that I didn't need to pay anyone for the privilege of stepping on their scale and be humiliated or have someone tell me I was eating too many of the wrong things and not enough of the right things. I knew which foods were healthy and which were not. I had learned that consuming more calories than I was expending would cause weight gain. Some say that if one knows all that, why continue in these self-defeating behaviors, gaining weight and continuing to be heavy? One of the keys to my success was surrendering to the weekly weigh-in-- having to report and be accountable to someone else. In my case, I found that I couldn't "do it myself"."

For years I've "done it myself" with mediocre and short-lived success controlling my diet. I have enjoyed regular exercise for a number of years, but the diet part was a losing battle. After reading this book again (or at least parts of it again) this past winter, I knew that I "couldn't do it myself" either. I've been going to Weight Watchers since February, and although I didn't have 100 pounds to lose like the author, it's been a long road to lose 15. I've watched a number of woman lose 50 pounds in the same amount of time as it's taken me to lose 15, but I've learned a lot. It wasn't about learning how and what to eat. It has been about attending groups, developing supportive friendships, and having a place to go where I could ask for help and be accountable.

This book inspires not only those struggling with body issues, but with grieving and chronic illness issues, as well. Ms. Hansen's faith and love for her family helped her through this journey and continue to play an important role in her continued success. If you're interested, check out http://www.runningwithangels.com/ for more information about this and a new title by Pam Hansen.